I recently finished teaching two Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) groups. The power of the connection that develops among MBSR students coming together at random never ceases to inspire me. Over 8 weeks, a group of strangers meet — nowadays via zoom — to practice, explore and share what they are noticing. And along the way, something magical happens: Connection. Community. It’s the “secret sauce” of MBSR.
How is this possible? We don’t talk much in class about “who we are”. Students don’t usually meet or speak between classes. At the end of the program, we may know very little about each other in any traditional sense, and yet the intimacy and care that often develops are real.
Have you ever been on a walk with a young child? Perhaps you were excited to be taking them somewhere, and you were focused on getting there. Perhaps you had an idea of how long you thought it would/should take. And what happened? Every step of the way the child discovers something amazing. It doesn’t actually matter if you are walking in nature or on a city sidewalk: “Look - it’s a bus!” “Look at that construction vehicle!” “What’s this?” “Did you see that bird?” “What’s that sound?” “Wait, I want to watch this!” “Oh, this is gross - can I touch it?” Sure, if you are attached to your agenda it can be quite frustrating, but what a delight to see the ordinary with the wonder of a child! The child is less focused on getting someplace. For the child, it is all about the journey (that is until “Look at this!” turns into “Are we there yet?????”
How much we miss by moving through our days on automatic pilot, alone in our thoughts and habits even when we are with others!
Jon Kabat-Zinn, who created the MBSR program in 1979, likes to say that each one of us is a genius. And it is true! I love the way the course unfolds - I am guiding, but the students are describing the unfolding landscape. And though we may be (certainly are) traversing quite different terrains, the journey of the heart is remarkably similar.
In the MBSR course, the invitation is to step out of our automatic, habitual ways of being and to begin to see the world around us more directly. In the example above, the child is our tour guide: In class, we actually become each others’ tour guides, as we begin to rediscover the wonder that is around us that we have been too preoccupied to notice.
Unlike in 1979, when MBSR was first conceived, there are now many ways available to access mindfulness instruction, including numerous excellent meditation apps — and perhaps you’ve been using one of those. But these apps can’t provide the richness of ongoing direct contact with an experienced teacher, or the power of the “secret sauce” unleashed by practicing and exploring in community. As a student shared at the end of the first virtual MBSR course I offered over a year ago at the start of the pandemic: “When I think back on this time, this course will be what I remember.”
Elaine Retholtz is certified by both the Center for Mindfulness at UMass Memorial Hospital and the Mindfulness Center at Brown University as an MBSR teacher and an MBSR Teacher Trainer. She has been practicing meditation for almost 40 years and teaching MBSR for 16 years. Her next MBSR course begins with an orientation on Wednesday evening April 21st. Register here.